So, you walk into a room and you don’t know anybody. Immediately your mind is thinking, oh, my gosh like is anyone going to like me, should I just leave should I get out of here? Guys, take a breath, relax. In today’s video, three powerful body language techniques that you can use to immediately send a signal of trust. Now, the three techniques I’m about to cover may sound incredibly simple and that’s where it’s dangerous because we think, oh, I know this information. That’s the thing is like we know a lot of things, but we don’t practice them. So, using one is good, but using them all together consistently, that’s where the power is at and where you’re going to want to train yourself up. And at the end of this video, I’ll talk about how to do that.
The first technique to build trust is to show your hands. Yes, you want to make it obvious that you don’t have a weapon that you are not going to hurt this person. You are not going to curl them up into a fist, so don’t put them behind your back. Don’t, you know, don’t hide your hands, don’t put them down like this. What that does and it’s going back to our brain, it’s the idea that, okay, this is a fight or flight. I know that sounds extreme, but think about an extreme example. You get pulled over by the police, you are you have someone that is, you know, questioning you. You don’t put your hands — you don’t reach in here, what that does to them, okay, what’s this guy grabbing, what’s going on here. They are at heighten sense and they are looking for a threat. Now, most people won’t say that they’re doing that, but we are.
In a sense we meet someone for the first time, we are measuring them up, we’re trying to make determination how much time do I want to spend is the value of this person. I know it sounds shallow, it sounds frivolous, but this is actually what people are looking at what they are making a determination of and you want to quickly show them, hey, I am no threat here, it is a pleasure to meet you. And that’s why, you know, one of the reasons you extend your hand out you actually make it very well-known, hey, I don’t have anything to, hide in fact, here is my hand.
Body language technique number two to create instant trust gentlemen is to open yourself up. Basically, you’re exposing your soft tissue area. Dogs do this all the time. Think about the dog rolls over it shows you its stomach, it is not a threat and as human beings we pick up on this. A lot of guys they fall back into this habit. Yeah, they stand like this especially in the back corner, you know, why isn’t anyone talk to me, why isn’t anyone approaching me. Because you look like you don’t want to be approached. You are closing yourself off. When you want to meet people, well, you need to open yourself up, you need to show you’re not a threat that in a sense you are being vulnerable. Instantly, your trust level is going to go up. Technique number tree to create real trust is to have a genuine smile. Okay. There are fake smiles. Could you tell? Now, there are real smiles, you see the difference in that second smile. That second smile I thought of my daughter, Katya. And this morning she just loves to come up and just give me a hug when I wake up in the morning.
Every time she sees me it’s just awesome. So, you may have to actually think about something else, but don’t fake smiles, people can pick up on it. It doesn’t use the same muscle groups and people, you know, they’re like, okay, this is being forced versus a real sincere smile. Before I start everybody, I have to admit I am just thinking of something that makes me happy that makes me laugh and then I get into it. Because I kind of set the tone for myself, I get those muscle groups going because I know here on video I can’t hide fakeness. I mean you guys can watch hundreds of my videos, you will pick up on some videos maybe I’m a little bit off, but most of my videos I try to approach with a sincere happiness positive attitude. You can feel that you can see it, and you can bet when you’re meeting people for the first time their BS level detectors are really high and they’re going to say, God, this guy doesn’t even seem sincere.
You want to be sincere because all of a sudden your trust levels are going to go up. All right, gentlemen, so those are the three techniques. It sounds simple, right? But that’s where it’s dangerous because they sound so simple that you don’t actually practice them and that’s where what you have to do. If you don’t practice this, you’re going to show up to an event and maybe, yeah, maybe your work you’ve got three or four people that you know really well, they all think you’re a people person, they actually think you’re kind of funny you’re outgoing and you show up to this networking event and you immediately close off.
You you’re not used to it, you haven’t practice being in the situations. That’s why you need to get out there, go to your industry conferences, go out there and start meeting with people. Perhaps go to a bar, go to a club, go out there maybe with some friends just so that you can practice and you can see, hey, am I actually showing my hands, am I opening up, am I smiling genuinely. And, invite you to come out to Style Con in Atlanta, Georgia where you can meet me, you can meet tons of body language experts people that have really great social skills.
You can see these people in action, how they get up on stage, how they walk up to people they don’t even know and they’re able instantly to build a connection that create trust by following these and tons of other techniques. Gentlemen, take this video, use it. I really want you guys not just to passively absorb this information, but to find the strength to find, you know, go out there and practice so that you can use clothing, you can use image, you can use style to get what you want out of life. That’s it. I’ll see you in the next video. .